A new kind of balancing act

Before I went on my trip, I wrote about my concerns of finding a good balance between videoing and participating while in Jos. As it turned out, that wasn't an issue and if there was ever a question of which to choose, I chose to be there in the moment without the camera. A good example of this was a conversation I had outside the clinic on the wall with a woman waiting for her sister. I had a nice talk with her and let her son play with my still camera while we talked. (see pictures). And when her sister came out of the clinic I didn't grab the camera and ask to shoot them, although I knew I'd built up enough trust with them to get their permission. Instead, I talked with her for a little while and even prayed with them before heading off to lunch...which I was about 30 minutes late for. Anyways, it was a really nice interaction that I couldn't spoil with technology. It was just a genuine conversation that will be preserved in my memory and nowhere else.


So why am I bringing the balance issue up now? Cause it's an even greater concern now. Here's what I'm juggling: a job, editing 2 videos in the next 3 weeks for Faith Alive and First Pres, and trying to live a healthy life that doesn't involve staring at a computer for 14 hours a day. To complicate things, I am often really annoyed to be at work editing videos that essentially tell people how to make lots of money so that they can be happy. The real theme is follow your passion, and that'll bring you success, and that'll lead to happiness. But when a book by the title of Do What You Love and The Money Will Follow is cited as a source of inspiration, I think we all can figure out that the idea is money is what makes you happy in some form or fashion. Now I don't mean to rail on my employer and I am very grateful for the work, it's just hard to work on those videos for eight hours while I know that I have the content at home to be making a video that really can make a difference in someone's life. I really enjoyed working on that piece for the church last week because it was for something that I believed in. That's doing what I love, and it's not with the premise of leading to financial gain. Would I love to get paid to make these kinds of videos? Heck yes. Would I love to do these kinds of videos even if the pay was only enough to scratch by with? Absolutely, because I would be producing something with a purpose. Look, I don't mean to get all preachy and this is getting way off topic, but it's playing a big role in my stress as of late. The fact of the matter is simple: I want to work on my videos for FA, but by the time I get home and cook (though Anna has been great at giving me time off from that) and eat, I have at the most 2 hours of good brain power left. And that's all assuming that there are no other evening commitments. So where is the balance to be found? I've already planned to work on the weekends for the next few weeks, but I still need more time. I still am confident that I can get these projects done, but the quality of them is my main concern. I want to ensure that what I hand off to the FA board is something they'll actually want to use, and something I'm proud to say I made.

So now that I've typed for 15 minutes, I hope I can shift into editing mode. But I really needed to vent some of that...Anna has probably heard enough. So thanks for reading if anyone still does. I'm still going to write, so check back every so often.